Toxic Relationship
timer Published Date:2nd Oct, 2020

You taught me love was slammed doors,

red bruises on my arms,

And you choking me in the middle of the night.

I learned that love was your silence,

and broken glass vessels on the floor.

I learned that love was you inside my body,

And your greedy fingers destroying temples of my skin.

You taught me love was cutting,

It was bleeding,

It was burning.

It was shouting.

Because love was your plain pride.

Your pleasures neatly wrapped up in a silver foil.

Because love was your anger,

all happy and smiles outside the walls.

But you hitting me behind these closed portals,

You taught me love was never mine,

It was my lowered voices,

My swollen eyes,

It was all my fault.

You taught me I was never enough,

So I learned to change,

I learned to bend.

I learned to kneel.

You taught me love was selfish,

It was frustration,

It was toxic. It was violent.

Love was not actually loving me,

But instead it was crying,

It was breaking,

It was begging.

It was exhausting.

Love was harsh words.

Love was holding me hostile.

It was never free.

You taught me love that was deeper than disgust,

Yet again,

You taught me how love was slammed doors,

red bruises on my arms,

And you choking me in the middle of the night.

You taught me love was grey,

False hopes and empty promises.

You taught me love was never mine.

So I learned to change,

I learned to let go.

And I learned to walk away.

BOOKSView All

अल्टिमेट आकाश

अल्टिमेट आकाश

लेखक : Santosh Lamichhane

मिती : November, 2018

भावनाको तरेलीमा

भावनाको तरेलीमा

लेखक : एन. पी. खतिवडा

मिती : 2016

मुना मदन

मुना मदन

लेखक : Laxmi Prasad Devkota

मिती : Evergreen

चामल खानेहरू र चौलानी पिउनेहरू

चामल खानेहरू र चौलानी पिउनेहरू

लेखक : Santosh Lamichhane

मिती : September, 2015

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BOOKSView All

अल्टिमेट आकाश

अल्टिमेट आकाश

लेखक : Santosh Lamichhane

प्रकाशन: November, 2018

बितरक : Samakalin Sahitya Pratisthan

भावनाको तरेलीमा

भावनाको तरेलीमा

लेखक : एन. पी. खतिवडा

प्रकाशन: 2016